As we live life more intentionally, we will feature series from those who have walked the path others are currently on. Today’s feature is by a dear friend and lover of God. She intentionally chose to wait and take the right decision in marriage regardless of the fact that culturally, most women above a certain age who are done with schooling (and sometimes still in school) are pressured into marriage. Sit back, relax and read 🙂
“Jesus loves me this I know, for the bible tells me so……” anyone remembers this profound song thought in Sunday school when we were kids? Yes Jesus loves me and I know it. One of the biggest affirmation of God’s love for me aside what the bible tells me is the gift of my darling husband, he’s my answered prayer!
You see as a teenage girl, I have always known that the choice of a life partner wasn’t one to be taken casually. Although I made a few mistakes and experienced heart break, I realised that living for God is what I was originally created for, not for a relationship or a husband. At such I called it quit with a relationship I had stubbornly held on to even though I knew deep down within me it was leading nowhere. Was it an easy decision? Capital NO. As a matter of fact I was under a lot of pressure as most of my friends were married/ getting married at that time. I remained unperturbed and was determined to obey God no matter what it takes or how long I will have to wait for the right man to find me.
I remember on one occasion I had a conversation over phone informing a concerned uncle and aunty of mine (my beloved parent and role models were late then ) who felt this banker girl does not realise that her biological clock was ticking fast or so I thought, that I would not take any further step regarding marriage until I’m 100percent sure because I know what I want. On another occasion, a darling sister and colleague who happens to know one of my suitors had said I was being too picky. In her words “ Jummy this guy is cool na, he’s nice, he has a well paid job, attends a Pentecostal church, and he’s ready to settle down “ , hmmm me I knew he wasn’t born again even though he was attending a Pentecostal church so it was a no no for me. One of our Pastors in the church where I attended also approached me concerning a brother who had reported me to him simply because he couldn’t understand why a single lady like me would not jump on his offer lol. In all of these I was resolute with my decision and maximised my waiting period to love and serve God more, understand His purpose for me and invest in myself and career. Some of the useful books I read were “The lady, her lover and her Lord by T.D Jakes, “Being single God’s way”, and lots more. I wasn’t hard on myself at all, rather I hung out with meaningful friends and pampered myself alot, which was the period I bought my first car.
I knew that I couldn’t do life with just anyone so I had to wait on God’s best for me. I desired and specifically prayed for a man who loves God genuinely to be my husband. I prayed for a man whose purpose will align with mine, who would know my worth, respect me, adore me, encourage me, be a great father to the children the Lord will bless us with and give me enough room to spread my wings. So when I met my husband, even though we were course mates back in the university but we weren’t friends, it didn’t take long for me to know he was the ONE but I let him do the chasing. I couldn’t even see what he didn’t have; all I could and can still see is the content, his essence, his heart and his spirit. Did I forget to mention that he was residing in Lagos while I was working in Maiduguri , a far Northern city in Nigeria. The distance didn’t mean a thing to him as he came all out for me.
We’ve been married for five years and still counting and I can confidently say that Tokunbo, my darling husband is everything I prayed for!
Indeed God is a good God and He gives good gifts to those who ask him, Matthew 7:11.
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